The Rise of Nico Jericho Januz Kilroy Augustin.

Fighter.. Fighter.. Fighter..!!!

Someone's been chanting that in my sleep. Who??!! ME!!! :] I can picture myself wearing those army pants and having this deadly killer look on my face. Two black lines crossed across my face and the expression of an enthusiastic SOLDIER ready for battle..Rawr.. ahahaha. Man i am a fighter, it may not look like i am from the outside, but this thing inside me called "FIRE" keeps burning my soul just making it Glow even brighter than before, kinda like the roasting process in cooking, ROASTING the hell out of a BBQ Chicken. Lolz. What am i destined to be? A warrior? i don't know whether i can call myself a warrior, but i am a SURVIVOR for sure.. I have survived this harsh world for so long now, and now, it's the rise of ME!!

(See the look in my eyes, I'm a soldier, I'm a miracle)

I invision myself rising from the ground, as dramatic as it may seem, i dont really care anymore, words describe an action, THIS IS MINE, MY SET OF WORDS... i've got this thing called PASSION FOR LIFE instilled deep within me.. I am a changed person.. I went through all the pain and bullshit to finally realize WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU, ONLY MAKES YOU STRONGER.. it just goes to show that when the body suffers, the spirit flowers..

I went through a lot.. Unfortunate fates, miserable endings, wretched circumstances, but now, I'M GOing through a METAMORPHOSIS age, A MAJESTIC BEGINNING, A Rise, This part of me unfolds.. How? Why? Blame Fate, Blame SHit.. Blame Misery, BLAME EVERYTHING.. If the world was perfect, then i'm destined for greatness, seeing it isn't, i gotta IMPROVISE.. I am a soldier! Hear that sound?!! That loud bang, That loud thump??~~.. Yea, That's the sound of my HEARTBEAT marching to the sound and rhythm of RESSURECTION.. A GRanD ReNewaL!

Take what's yours and own it.. Slap fear in the face and grab it by the neck and show it that fist of yours.. Threaten it, iNTimidate it, Burn It, KILL it, step on it.. Nothing can stop you if you put your mind to it.. This life was designed for misery to slip in, but if you take the right steps and precaution to seal the door for desolation to come busting in, then you're set for life.. PICTURE TOMORROW, picture your dreams coming true, WHEN YOU CAN'T, invision OPTIMISM, and i can assure you it'll be the GPS System that guides and steers you to your DREAMS..

FIGHTER.. FIGHTER.. FIGHTER..!!!

The chants coming from my PAST.. The chants coming from my FUTURE, THE CHANTS meeting up in the middle, MY PRESENT...

The pain and struggles are nothing but scratch marks and scars on me now.. It's a tattoo that symbolizes the reason for my REVIVAL.. Look me in the eyes, no matter how much you try to scare me off from living my life, I WILL SURIVE.. I'll bleed to surive, I'll take chances, I'll take a shot, a bullet, a beating, i'll go through a fire for what it's worth only to rise again, NOTHING'S gonna be the barricade that suroounds this newly found zest of mine.. Shoot me with bullets, I'll be spittin em bullets wif words.. See the look in my eyes, I WILL SURVIVE THIS WORLD..

I've been to the bottom, i've suffered enough. Thank you for making me suffer, thank you for taking everything away from me, thank you for all the crap, thank you for all the stepping, thank you for the pain! NOW WATCH ME COMEBACK!! Now watch this new side of me!


-Maino:

"It's easy to hate, It's harder to love me Ya'll don't understand, Ya'll quickly to judge me Put your foot in my Nikes, Picture you livin' my life, Picture you stuck in a cell, Picture you wasting your life, Picture you facing a charge, Picture you beating the odds, Picture you willing to bleed, Picture you wearing the scar Thank you for making me struggle, Thank you for making me grind I perfected my hustle, Tell me the world ain't mine You've been seein' me lately, I'm a miracle baby I refuse to lose "

-yESterday was just a synopsis of what today really is-
Nico Jericho Januz Kilroy Augustin

Counting the days that pass me by.

As i start to close my eyes, i see nothing but blurry images of myself. I find that i have somehow gotten myself stuck in here, somewhere i really don't belong. As i take a second to catch my breath, i hear voices all around me, moving from one direction to the next, kinda like the buzzing sound of an annoying mosquito. When i turn to see where it's coming from, i see nothing, better yet, I SEE NO ONE.. Is this is a dream? I can't be asking myself this question if it really was a dream i was in, now can i? But then again, there is such a thing as "a dream in a dream".. Either way, this is a very uncomfortable situation i am in. I fell lost, blue, down and most of all, worn out.. The words i'm hearing are starting to get old, and all i need is an answer. I can't remember how i end up here.

(Death, you don't plan it)

Before u know it, the clock strikes 8PM, there i am, wide awake to the sound of my handphone alarm going "Kringgg".. As i turn to press the stop button on it, i realize Nokia has zapped me back into reality. Was it a dream i was in? It sure as hell didnt feel like one, a NIGHTMARE's more like it.

Man i'm really stressed here, college life is fun.. But u have ur bad days, annoying people around u, the shit loads of assignment trailing u like a ghost whose yearning for revenge, "fakes" all around me, exams around the corner.. Well practically everything. I dunno why, but it always feels like when one bad thing comes ur way, a whole OTHER BUNCH of shit comes chasing you too.

I wish i could pause this life and change the path of some things, of how events are gonna turn out so that i dont have to suffer this crisis every now and then. Coz right now, it feels like i'm just standing in the middle of the street where all my problems are passing me like speeding cars and at the same time, the cars slows down in a matrix kinda way to make u realize what they are, and then speeds up again. Why am i feeling this way? I wish i knew.. I seriously do.

So what am i doing about it? Theres nothing i can do.. Maybe i need a break. Maybe i miss home. Well maybe's not a speculation anymore, I DO MISS HOME. i can't wait to go back.. Home's the only place i feel secure, it offers me this sense of BELONGING. People say time flies, yes it happens sometimes, but now, when ur really anticipating something, like me, anticipating the day i'll be back home, TIME slows down in such a way that a single minute feels like an hour and days feel like months.. Man everything's so undefined. When can i truly find happiness in life? I'm starting to doubt the existence of it..

There's obviously nothing else i can do.. All i can do is to wait for the days to pass till i get home and maybe gain a lil bit' of my old-self back again, even if its for a split second, because to change this shitty feeling i'm in, I'D DO ANYTHING. For now, i just hope i can stay alive.. Hopefully i won't die before i get to see the better side of life.. Emotional much? Nah, i think life is EMOTIONAL, being so complicated and twisted.

We'll bring life into my deepest hopes. What's ur fantasy?

"Once upon a time" never left the hearts of many.. I know a lot of you out there still believe in fairytales, girls wishing that one day their Prince Charming would come and RESCUE them, Guys waiting for their beautiful Princess to take control over their destiny.. Well, everyone has a story to tell. Check this one out.

(I believe in fairytales)

~I WAS BORN TO TELL YOU I LOVE YOU~

(I recognize the way you make me feel, It's hard to think you might not be real)

(When I catch my breath, it's you i breathe)

(When I touch your hand, it's then I understand the beauty that's within, it's now that we begin)

Once upon a time, there lived a Prince, This makes it CHAPTER ONE:

Once upon a time, LONG long time ago,
there was a prince, a prince who liked to show.
He'd show off his shoes, and show off his clothes,
he'd show off his face, and even his nose.
He'd show off his gold, and count them one and two,
hundreds by millions, right in front of you.
One day a small child came, Emilly was her name
and asked the prince for a favor.
He said. "No I'm not that kind of prince to do that kind of labor.
"The Emilly walked away, from the path now crying."
Then the next day, a woman came, and stated she was dying.
She was old and hard to hear, but this is what she said, this is what she feared.(In an old women’s voice.)
"I fear my time has come at last, please help my family before I pass."
"Make sure they have what it is they need,
please give them this letter, give it for me."
"The prince just laughed. "I don’t' think you know who I am."
" I'm the prince you understand."
"I don't run errands for peasants like you."
"You've got to be kidding ... That I just won' t do."
Someone ran by and took the women by the hand,
as they walked around from the mean ole' prince, who just didn't understand.
The next morning a new, a knock at his highness door.
Very early in the morn', it was almost 4.
He ranted and raved, "How dare you." he burned.
But before another word. a Fox, he had turned.
The guards ran in, To find a Fox.
"Raharraharrahar" "sneeze" says the fox. And they threw him out, in a box.
The box was carried to the woods, where he was released, like a fox should.
He rented and raved. "Take me back, I demand it”
but no one understood, not one, understands it.
So he sits down alone, lost, and unfound.
Wouldn't anyone worry about their prince, uncrowned?
Darkness came, he wondered here and there,
the rain poured down, soaking everywhere.
He found a tree, where he finally took shelter.
"They'll find me they have to, I'm the crown prince of Belter."
(Next morning he woke to find a blue jay, looking at him.)
She says. "Your the prince that caused all the trouble,
now look at you, your in a fix of a bubble."
"How dare you speak to me in that tone." The prince said.
(The blue jay plops down in from of him, wings on her hips.)
"Who do you think you are, Mr. Fox without a home?"
"You were never nice, you never helped a soul."
"What makes you so special now,(shaking her winged feathered finger at him)
just a fox in a foxhole."
He took a min to think what it seems.
A fox he thought. "So it wasn't a dream."
The Blue jay she says, "There's only one way to become human once more."
"Learn kindness and love, then teach what the meaning is for."
The Fox got to his feet, "But how do I?" before another word she flies,
With only this to answer, it's all he really had.
"This is so stupid he said, and this is sooo bad."


Chapter Two. Along Came The Girl:

As he walked alone in the woods, he found himself not as he should.
Long days and nights, went by, never knowing how or why.
One day as he was sitting in the sun, he saw a little girl on the run.
It was the same girl that had asked for help,
“Oh boy.” Said the fox prince in a disgusted tone. “What more can be dealt?”
The little girl stopped, and set by the stream.
Opened her book and started to read.
The fox moved in closer, to get a better look,
and then he too started reading the book.
The girl glanced over, to see the prince.
“What is this?” she says. “Are you reading this?”
The fox looks up at her, and Shakes his head saying yes.
She looks at him bewildered. “Is this some kind of test?”
“You look so lost, don’t you have a home?”
The fox shakes his head and says “No.”
“What is this?” she says. “You can talk?”
“You must tell me everything, what its like to be a fox?”
But when he tried to answer her, nothing seemed to come.
No speech or words or anything, just a great big GRUMP.
“Well you must be in some kind of trouble not being able to say what it is.”
“Maybe I can help you, I can be your friend.”
The prince didn’t know what to think, a friend he thought, how quant.
I never had a friend before; I wonder what she’s got in store?
He says “Why sure, why not, how quant, what a thought.”
“Okay it’s settled.” she says, “Time to come home, before mum goes to bed.”


Chapter Three. Friendship and love? You figure it out:

So they spent their mornings playing by the pond,
reading books and building up a bond.
One day he thought, this isn’t so bad, I feel much happier and much more glad.
I treated her wrong, and misunderstood,
they work so hard for the little they should.
When I become prince once more I think, I might just change what I didn’t make.
The prince and the girl, became close, they seemed a pair at the very most.
One day the girl set out alone, into the woods a part not shown.
The fox looked and looked she was nowhere to be found
so he set out on foot, onto the ground.
He followed her scent, with his nose to the spot.
Going this way and that, no he never did stop.
He called out to her, “Are you here?” “Are you there?”
“Please tell me are you anywhere?”
He finally found a piece of her shawl, and then he really started to call.
“Emily!!!” he yelled. Searching everywhere
and low and behold he found her lying there.
“Oh please be okay,” said the fox prince.
And tears started rolling, “Has it really come to this?”
"I don’t want to be human, I don't want to go home,
just save her life, I love her you know.
He licked her cheeks and prayed to die. Please take me, not her, take my life.
And with a soft glow, that formed around them.
He turned back into the prince, the one he had once been.
He held her in his arms, as he bent to his knees.
He kissed her lips, and said, “Oh please.”
She woke with a start, and knew it was him,
the fox that he was, the prince he now is.
He carried her back to his castle on high.
They got married and lived, under a peaceful sky.
From that forth he taught everyone to be nice.
He showed his kingdom, just how to be kind.
He taught love and faith, truth and trust.
And they lived happily ever after, with not a single fuss.

Praise.

What am i gonna talk about today? Hmm let's see, My day wasn't all that interesting, except for the fact that my fav football club MANCHESTER UNITED had a 3-2 win against Aston Villa.. [It was an awesome win.. They were down 1-2 and managed to climb all the way up to a 3-2 finish in the last few remaining minutes].. Well all in all, Ronaldo scored 2 awesome goals, one from a freeKICK-position and another by an inch away from the post, and the third goal was scored by a freshman. Not bad, NOT BAD AT ALL.. Not to rub it in to all u non-MANU Supportors, but yea GLORY GLORY ManUNITED!!!! ahahaha..

[Glory, Glory ManUNITED!!]

[The man that makes wonders and miracles happen, not forgetting GETTING THE JOB DONE!!]

[I'm one of the REDS, though i don't wear RED Shirts that often, But yea, Nike? One of the Official sponsors for ManUNITED. :) ]

Anyway, besides that, i pretty much got nothing to shout about. Hmm. Days like this make me wish i had more entertainment in my life, but i guess i do have my good days, and my dull days. lolz. Lets see, i've been studying here in KL for almost a year now and what have i learnt'? ALOT.. i learnt the true meaning of being independent, being stressed out to the max, having to deal with crazy situations, well it's a wild wild world people, u gotta grab what u want before the opportunity fades..

Life couldn't get much better till you meet a bunch of interesting people who can decorate ur presence with laughters and comfort. That's when you realize that FRIENDS are the sibblings God forgot to give us. I'm a Christian, Roman Catholic to be exact, and i believe that God has a plan for each and every single one of us, but if God has a plan for all of us, then he surely knows how everything's gonna turn out right? Isn't it all written in the propechy you may ask me? And if God knows how our life's gonna turn out to be, then why is he making us choose what is wrong and what is right in life? Well the answer is simple people.. God is giving us a chance to choose between the good and bad things in life, why? well lets just put it into a situation, God wants everyone to love him, but if he's God and powerful, why dont he just make us love him? Well because FORCED LOVE is not love at all. Indeed for us to Love Him, He must give us the choice to not love him. Clear? well it make sense, to me atleast..

If we were to talk about religions, we'd surely meet alot of resistance, because none of us are adequate enough to express the truth for God is a mystery, and if everyone knew the mysteries that lies within Him, Then He's not God at all, no? God is Great, God is Love, I'm thankful that i even managed to survive for over 18years now, i have learnt alot in life, but not enough, every single day is still a new day for learning and a process for me to nourish my brain and soul wisdom. So with that, i'm greatful to even still be here. You should too :]

Everytime i CLose My Eyes :D

OMG! i've been listening to Babyface's "EVERYTIME I CLOSE MY EYES" over 35 times now. :D yes, and i dunno y, but i just love this song. and i've been checking out YouTube for Acoustic Cover versions of this song too.. and i found this group of guys, consisting of 3 ppl [AJ, Albert and Mark] who made an awesomeeeee cover of this song... So check out the link below. :p

(Everytime I Close My Eyes, I Thank The Lord that I Got You)

Girl it's been a long, long time comin', yes it has
But I, I know that it's been worth the wait
It feels like springtime in winter
It feels like Christmas in June
It feels like heaven has opened up it's gates for me and you

CHORUS:

Every time I close my eyes
I thank the lord that I've got you
And you've got me too
And every time I think of it
I pinch myself cuz I don't believe it's true
That someone like you loves me too

Girl I think that you're truly somethin', yes you are
And you're, you're every bit of a dream come true, yes you are
With you baby, it never rains
And it's no wonder
The sun always shines when I'm near you
It's just blessing that I have found somebody like you
Ooh Oh
CHORUS

To think of all the nights I've cried myself to sleep
You really oughta know how much you mean to me
It's only right, it's only right
(In my life) that you be in my life right here with me
Oh baby, baby, yeah

(-Kenny G. sax solo-)

I'll tell you girl that...

(Chorus to fade)


Well anyway, I LOVE THIS SONG!! hahahaha. here's the link to the YouTube Video
>>>>>> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYK7WBHmsqM

TanGled up iN u.

How does a simple hello turn to goodbye?
When am i able to spread my wings and fly?


Things i wish i knew,
Instead of a smile, the situation's turning blue.
Another day goes by, another word not spoken,
Whenever i say goodbye, my feelings for u sharpen,

A new day comes, and still nothing's changed,
Mixed feelings consume me, damn it feels like i'm stucked n framed.
Words dont come easy and neither do rhymes,
Hand me my guitar now, bet i can't write no lines.

Dont stop, keep moving, keep telling you that,
All the thing's i've said, i guess i've made u mad,
I'd say I'm sorry, but timbaland said it's too late to apologize,
I know everyone's different, it takes one more than to just analize

I'm scared of turning back, I'm scared of knowing the truth,
My hapiness lately, all the smiles and laughs, YEA ur the leading root,
You're dazzling in every way, just fun and strong,
Your life, your dreams, they're like a beautiful sonG..

GirL I'm only human, i'm full of many faults, i'm guaranteed to fall short, what a privilage it is to even know ur name.. Life's a risk, Standin here, i guess i'm taking a shot..

Through Nicky's Eyes.

Have you ever wanted to do something or tell someone something through a picture or even PICTURES for that matter? Well I have…,

[A Picture Worth a Thousand Words]

(I wish i could teach the world to sing, listen to their voices and have them jumpin from the joy i bring)

(Everyone's waiting for a fairy; Everyone wishes their life was like a scene in a fairytale, just waiting for their HAPPY EVER AFTER ENDING.. With a bit of faith and patience, it might just come)

(It's a wonder sometimes how two people can turn from being strangers to friends, and back to total strangers all over again.. Come on people, shit happens.. Even if you've had a breakup with your partner, stay friends.. Don't think of the bad memories you guys shared, there's still the good times you've had, no?)

(I wish i could teach a soul to fly, take the pain out of their hands and help them hold em' high)


(I wish i can bring back the people that died. When will all the suffering stop? When the whole of mankind is totally wiped off? Innocent lives are being taken every single day)

(When right goes wrong, just say a little prayer. Instead of thinking about whose going to die today, The Lord is gonna help you feel better, so you ain't gotta cry today. So we gotta pray, all we got is faith)




(Music lifts the spirit of the world with the words in some songs. I wish some long gone influential rappers could still scream their lungs out, and bullets could reverse so that Tupac and Biggie would Breathe again)

(Wish we could keep achieving wonders, see the visions of the world through the eyes of Stevie Wonder)

(I wish that we only saw good news everytime we watched CNN, and wish that we can never get the blues)

(I wish that we could hold hands, listen instead of dissin lessons from a grown man)


(I wish everybody would just stop and freeze, and ask why we are fulfilling these downfalls and these prophesies)

(Only the Heavenly Father can ease the hurt and pain, just let it go and keep praying on your knees in church)

Just trying to spread my thoughts and words through the eyes and wisdom of a believer.

Thoughts of a Dreamer.

[Although this photo is nothing more than a simple tree frozen from the cold weather, with a light behind it, it feels like so much more]

This photo is dedicated to anyone and everyone that is need of a little encouragement and hope. Things these days are getting pretty rough in the world, failing economy, increased unemployment, continued war... If this small tree can blossom after a chill like this, we all can make it through the hard time. When it all seems to be too much, take a deep breath, say a prayer, and remember to hold on to your hopes, dreams and most importantly, your faith....

I am a dreamer, a fighter, a lover, everything from A-Z.. But one thing's for sure, i'm not perfect. When it comes to being lucky, i may even be cursed.

But either way, i'm trying people.. Trying my very best to survive this ferocious world. Throughout my whole 18 years of living, i have always had a dream, as cheesy and cliche' as it may seem, my dream is TO WORK IT OUT... To make something out of myelf, but how can i do so with this ever changing world filled with lies and hypocrisy?? Someone please come and save me, HELP ME OUT!!

Before i know it, i'm left in this situation, this scene where i'm falling far-far off from the ledge, BAM!~ bEFore i know it, Gravity gets me back on the right track in life. Why? Maybe that's HOPE telling me to keep on trying.. Who exactly is "hope"? My family? My friends? The ones i love? No.. Hope's this burning fire in me.. The burning fire for passion and desire.. Telling me that it won't stop burning till my flames spread all over and that's a metaphor for me to achieve the things i desire most in life..

My dream is to be SoMeBoDY, i am somebody now, but i'm only 25% through my journey in becoming the real person i want to be. As crazy as i may seem, i don't just want my name up in lights, nor fame to take over my life overnight, but i just want to be COMFORTABLE in life. Yes i do go out of my mind sometimes thinking about extraordinary stuff, but i'm still RIGHT IN THE HEAD people, i can still think straight, and A COMFORTABLE LIFE is what i WANT in LIFE.

So here's a goodbye statement to all the obstacles out there, i couldn't agree more on how ADIDAS said that "IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING". It sure is.. I'm sorry, but it's time i took a stand, a point where i wave this 5 fingers i have on both my left and right hands to all the doubts and hopelessness that surrounds my hopes and dreams, you are no longer welcome in my presence. Dramatic much? U tell me.. Yes we learn from mistakes, but if we leave no room for mistakes, TRIUMPH can flame up faster..

So cheers to all the bad times and the past, for, The Future Belongs To Those Who Believe In The Beauty Of Their Dreams.